Innocent Grey
by Uncle.Dragon
Summary: Chikane muses on how cute Himeko was when she was a kid, under the grey skies. Otherwise she would be mourning.


Today, jealousy was the color of blue.

Or so the Mother of all Vampires, going by the human name Chikane thought.

Blue was the color of the girl's uniform, hopping along the road with her father as he walked her to school, hand in hand. Blue was the color of her eyes that danced with happiness and bliss and delight. Blue was how the wide, summer sky tasted on the tip of her tongue that day. There were also a number of other blue things on the street, but right now, Chikane was only interested in the blinding blue harmony in front of her eyes and wondered what would happen if she cut the girl down with Murakumo before drinking her blood dry. Would the blue vanish? Or would it only serve to spread until it threatened to swallow the entire world?

"Let's hurry up, dad! School will be starting soon!"

Blue was a dreadful color that day, Chikane decided. Thankfully for her, the presence of grey, murky rainclouds were lingering on the horizon. She turned her eyes to that small stretch of grey and wondered what it would be like if the world was grey.

* * *

><p>Perhaps what made the color blue punch an aching hole in Chikane's chest that day was the memory of herself in a similar situation many years back.<p>

* * *

><p>"<em>Chikane onee-chan.<em>" A ten-year-old glaring Himeko pouted angrily as she scowled up at Chikane. "I _don't_ want to go. Everyone will just _laugh_ at me. I can't dance anyway!"

"Come on now," Chikane said, dragging the girl along the dirt road by her arm. "Don't be such a spoilsport, Himeko. All your friends will be there; even Souma is taking time off to come to this dance."

"You don't get it, onee-chan! He's only there because I am coming!"

Chikane laughed, obviously not believing in such a remarkable comment about the innocence of her children. "Then why don't you come along and drink strawberry milk with him?"

Himeko scowled deeper and ground her heels into the ground, refusing to move another step. "I don't want strawberry milk!" she protested, every part of her still refusing to budge from the spot. Chikane looked more amused than Himeko would've liked her to be.

"Then find a purpose for going, then," she said, tugging on Himeko once more. Himeko hesitated for a moment, and then finally gave in, letting Chikane lead her along the riverbank as sisters walked side by side in the dying light of the red sun. As the first stars began to appear in the sky, Himeko stopped and looked up at the twinkling eyes blinking down at the duo.

"Onee-chan?"

"Yes, Himeko?"

"Do you think…" Himeko blinked a few times before continuing. "Do you think that mother and father are in heaven?"

"I wouldn't know, Himeko."

Himeko clutched tightly onto Chikane's arm. "Do you think there's any chance they'll be in hell?"

"That's a pretty horrible question, Himeko. Are you planning to visit them?"

"I really want to meet them one day," Himeko replied, burying her face into Chikane's kimono. "I've only got a few hundred questions I need them to answer."

"I see. And Himeko?"

"Yes, onee-chan?"

"Did you finally decide on a reason to go to the dance?"

Himeko looked away. "Well… yeah."

"Would you mind telling me?"

Himeko never told her that the only reason she decided to go to the dance was so that she could walk the road together with her Chikane onee-chan.

* * *

><p>In her life, Chikane would make a list of things that she regretted doing. She would constantly go over this list while watching the sun set in the west, naming each cloud after another as they disappeared in the dying light.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>[Things ShojinChikane regretted while watching the sunset]**

_She regretted not probing Himeko anymore further about her reason. Maybe if she did, she would see the world in an entirely different light._

_She regretted not being strong enough to save Himeko and herself to their respective fates. If she had freed the both of them, Himeko wouldn't have to die in her arms.  
><em>

_She regretted not asking Himeko the few hundred questions she wanted her parents to answer because in the end, her sister was more of a parent to her than anybody ever was._

_But most of all, she regretted not holding onto Himeko's hand for a minute longer that night when she had asked about the stars._

* * *

><p>"We must seem like grains of sand to the stars," Chikane had replied. Himeko secretly questioned what the stars really saw when they looked down on earth.<p>

* * *

><p>There was a soft thump and Chikane opened her eyes blearily.<p>

Somehow she had fallen asleep on the rooftop of a ramen shop. Even as the world slowly swam into focus, she saw a blonde girl in a grey outfit looking down at her with a purple umbrella in her hands.

"What?" she asked groggily, shielding her eyes from the blinding sun with one hand. The girl only smiled.

"Are you a powerful Vampire?"

The question was innocent and simple; yet, Chikane couldn't help but think that there was a double meaning behind those words.

"Huh?" Chikane looked up at the girl, confused. "Wha—"

She had to quickly roll out of the way, for the girl had slammed the umbrella down on the roof where her head had been only a few seconds ago. She scrambled to her feet and drew Murakumo out, eying the girl guardedly but quickly brought Murakumo up again to meet the second blow from the umbrella. She secretly marveled at how tough the umbrella was as a shock ran down her body. There was a gaping hole in the roof when the dust cleared and Chikane looked at the girl in shock and confusion.

_Hi-Himeko?_

Chikane shook her head fiercely at the thought of the assailant being her Himeko, but no matter how she look at the girl, her hair, her ribbon, her eyes, and even her voice... they are exactly the same.

"What do you want with me?" she demanded warily. The girl smiled again.

"I'm looking for a strong mother."

Chikane barely had time to digest this when the girl attacked again, knocking her several meters backwards with a single punch. Chikane caught her foot in midair to prevent a death-delivering kick to her face and twisted it sharply. The girl yelped as there was a cracking sound and the skin broke, blood spurting out like a fountain before punching Chikane in the stomach, causing her to hit the ground on her back. Murakumo flew out of her hand and she was left with only her strength, claws and fangs. The girl limped over to her and rode on her stomach, looking down into her sadistic eyes.

"You're strong, Shojin-sama..."

A trickle of sweat ran down Chikane's blood-coated forehead.

"…will you be my mother?"

Will you be my mother?"

Will you be my _mother_?

The poor, defective clone. She had no idea what sort of terrible mother Chikane would prove to be.

* * *

><p>She had long fallen asleep on Chikane's chest, making the monster's breathing labored, but she didn't care. The sky had turned grey again and as Chikane closed her eyes, tiny droplets began to fall out of the sky.<p>

_We must look tiny to the raindrops when they're higher up_, she thought, opening her mouth slightly and tasting the rain upon her tongue. _But when they're this close, there really isn't much difference for us on the ground after all_.

Her fist slowly tightened around another wet but smaller wrist. The hand opened in response and held onto hers firmly. She wondered if Himeko's own hands had felt as little and fragile in contrast to hers and thought about how it felt now to this mere copy.

She wanted to replay that scene again, but she never imagined reliving it this way.

* * *

><p>Today, jealousy was the color of grey.<p>

Grey was the color of the girl's wet, damp clothes, stepping lightly over the shallow pools that formed murky mirrors in the footpath. Grey was the color of the gravel-stained bandages wrapped around the girl's left leg. Grey was how cold but reviving the horizon felt against her skin. Only today, grey would be the color of jealousy to somebody else, but not Chikane.


End file.
